The return to Des Moines

Making the drive, we had to stop for a bathroom, and found this gem.
It was fairly packed inside, a total middle of nowhere scene. Would have lov ed to hang out longer, but we had Des Moines to get to.

Good thing they don't allow guns!!
Also came across this. We found it funny :)
May have to click to enlarge to see the sign. Middle of corn farms!

While in Iowa City we'd had celebratory meal at Shorts, a restaurant co-owned by a Charger player! Didn't see him, but did find a good Iowa brewery, PeaceTree brewing! A little out of the way while we drove towards Des Moines, but well worth it!
Random small town,
Random building,
Super cool little place!
Their double IPA. Just started bottling it, not sold outside of iowa (bummer!!)
Lizzie & me drinking together :)

The Hearing

The hearing went fine. I think we spent a total of 30 minutes in the Court House. And maybe 20 minutes in that room (including photos below).

The Judge, after the hearing.
We had 3 attorneys. One that had represented the birthmom in termination of rights whom (I think) had been assigned temp custodian/guardian of Lizzie. And then another one that had been assigned to Lizzie to watch out for her rights. And then the one for us.
Calling Richard after the hearing. Lizzie is really ours. Elizabeth Wilcox!

Iowa City, IA

Drive was great!
Different sort of landscape, no traffic, etc.

This was across from our hotel. Lots of old buildings, LOTS of students wearing University of Iowa gear. Probably 97% of the people we saw.

This is the kind of stuff they sell. All sorts of Iowa stuff. Well, everything but a bottle opener. I think 4th store we finally found one.
Court House. Where everything would go down for Elizabeth Wilcox on 9/13/2011
Front of the Court House
Me & Lizzie patiently waiting for our hearing

Journey to Iowa

Sunday, September 11 Lizzie & I took off to Des Moines Iowa. There are no direct flights to Iowa from California. And we decided to leave from Carlsbad, which added a flight but saved on hassle of drive time (also easier, since Richard was gone all day anyways at the Charger Game).

Gramz delivered us to Palomar Airport for our 8pm departure


All ready to go!!
Our little plane from Carlsbad!



Lizzie had her own seat from Carlsbad to LAX,
we had a 2 or 3 hour layover, we did drinks (I found Karl Strauss and had a beer, she passed out after her bottle)





From LAX to Chicago, she did not have her own seat. Trying to get her to settle down and go to sleep (it was late!), I gave her another bottle. Full baby=sleepy baby. Except that this full baby puked all over me, just as we were pulling away from the gate. And by the time seat belt signs were off, she was passed out...and it would have been a mess to squeeze by my seatmates (and made for mad Lizzie). So we sat in it. And washed & changed at Chicago, super early the next morning.

Chicago to Des Moines was easy, she had her own seat and we were vomit-free! yay us!
Once there we went to Target, stocked up on diapers & formula and waited for Alice to get in a few hours later.

Her flight was uneventful (non-stop), we picked her up and drove east a couple of hours to Iowa City, where we got to finalize the adoption!

1 week out!

This coming Sunday, I will be flying with Lizzie to Iowa.
We'll taking a red-eye to Des Moines, arriving Monday morning and waiting for Alice who arrives there in the afternoon!

From there we drive to Iowa City and have the hearing!
Should be fun & exciting!!

I spoke with the attorney who will be representing Lizzie. She was assigned her own, and then Richard and I have ours. They both submit reports & everything to the judge, and it goes from there. I guess. But the conversation went well, things are good!

One week from now Alice and I will be celebrating Iowa-Style!!!

We have a date!!!

September 13, 2011 Lizzie will be fully legal!
Papers filed with the courts of Iowa City, IA
and we have an appointment time of 8:30am

Only Lizzie and I (Annie) need to be present, we got an exception for Richard, he doesn't need to be present.

Later than we had hoped. Both grandmothers are unable to travel there, which is kind of a bummer. And I had tentatively hoped to have a party to celebrate Labor day weekend, so that will be pushed back a bit.
But YAY, super close to being done!
And then all of these annoying and stressful delays will be a distant memory of a wonderful adventure.

Happy 8 Months Miss Lizzie!!!

Still working on getting a finalization date,
Once we have that Lizzie and Annie fly back to Iowa for a brief court hearing and Lizzie will legally & officially a Wilcox!
We *should* have the date by early next week.

7 months old

Lizzie is now 7 months old. Well, 7 months & a day :)

Sometime in May I had a brief conversation with the attorney in Iowa, Lori. Everything out there was good & great. She wondered if we were any closer to getting things finalized in California. I figured we were because we had an attorney here who was being paid to gather the correct papers (birth documentation, etc) and tell us what we needed to do (implied we did not need post placement visits, being a private adoption).

Each email I sent ended with "Let me know if there is anything Richard and I need to do!" and figured we were all good, since I never heard back really.

So I talk to the Iowa attorney, she says well, give the California attorney a call because you should be getting a date soon! 180 days past birth is when things can be finalized! And then she says if I can't get a hold of him, call the county, things would have been filed long ago, assuming he has everything needed, but sounds like he hasn't needed anything else from anyone.

County of San Diego has no idea who we are when I call them in May. Not under either of our names, under Lizzie's birthmom's name, not anywhere.

I finally get to speak with California attorney, who at this point, yes, almost 6 months (180 days!!!) later says it might be best to file & finalize in Iowa.

WHAT!?!

Would have been good to know that like back in November when he was hired.

So we now wait for the new Iowa attorney to have the papers (including all of the post-placement social worker visits we actually do need), and then he can file & get us assigned a court date we get to go to Iowa for a court hearing to finalize. Right.

Immediately start on the home study post-placement visits. Those are fine, turns out Lizzie is adjusting. And that the boys are fine with another sibling. Good stuff to know. And a new Iowa attorney is hired for the finalization part on our behalf. And things are moving along. Just more delayed than we would have liked.

Getting closer. for real this time, hopefully!

12 weeks old!

Look who is as big as a lemon!
Haha, it's actually a giant lemon, so doesn't show good proportion of Lizzie's normal sized head. But I still like the photo.

12 weeks ago we were hanging out in a hospital waiting room.
Getting ready to hold Lizzie, beside ourselves with nerves and anticipation.

Today I'm trying to figure out if I should take the 4 kiddos to Legoland for the morning and what the best way is to wrangle a child in the midst of the terrible-2's.

I've lost track of the weeks, in terms of when someone asks. I say either just over 2 months, or almost three months. But 12 weeks old is kind of a milestone, I guess :)

Stats from her 2 month appointment are
height (ha!): 21 inches, 10th percentile
weight: 9lbs 13.25ozs, 25th percentile

I continue to text photos of Lizzie to Desiree. Have sent a few collection of hard copy photos too. Haven't heard back since December. Which is how it goes, I guess. No "right" way for either side to do it. So we continue with what feels comfortable for us, and if anything changes on her end, feelings towards amount of contact, I just hope she lets us know.

Lizzie is loved.
See?
:)

Details, details...

Lizzie still does a lot of this (sleeping):
And also some of this (being made to dress up in outfits and being confused about it):

She's now gone to the beach (averaging a difference of about 70 degrees between here and Cedar Rapids, IA),
And met just about all of her extended family!
And she is getting cuter and cuter every day!

All that is left now for the adoption of Elizabeth are the smaller detail parts. Still big deals, but nothing that could really alter our family now :)

The birthfather did not seek custody,
we were represented in court yesterday by our attorney out there in frigid (single digits!!) Iowa winter wonderland. A perk of Iowa adoption law, we didn't have to fly out to be present :)

Finalization here in California is seperate, and we do need to be there, but that is a few months off still. And at that point her legal name will change from "Baby Girl J______" to Elizabeth Rose Desiree Wilcox. Can't wait!